Fish...and plants...and you acting like you care!

Apologies in advance for not being able to a) hold a camera still or b) own a tripod:

Don't you want to know what is in the tank? And don't you want to see the other tank too?

Alyssa the you-know-what

music: chromeo.

Song title: Night by Knight

Elliot is up

Girl don't be a momo

You don't know whitch way to go

What

what

what okya

yo

this is me.

I say she's too dramaic.

I think she's too boner matic in the vagina. night by nitha.

Go.

Just kidding.

Um.

Fu...

Dude...

doo

doo

doo

(poops!)

CORNER OF COLLEGE AND UNION up in this bitzhc.

(Cue dance party. by very white boys, not that I have anything to say about being white.)

(scene change)

(fade to black)

(slow leade into http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izrJEi-AB0o )

Elliot go.

yo my name is elliot B.

no no

no

no

no

fuck

no

no

hip hop

every time I do I do things.

lougie.

do the dougie.

that's what I was I was looking for beyofore on the floor your momma on the whore.

floors legit

and when I take a shit, its shlegit

"shitty long on my cock." -freeho

this shit it block

him hop hip o my slop and I eat the hen.

midget.

midget.

midget.

ridge-it.

bridget sucked my nuts.

On the fence.

on putting my defense.

holly at you momma bitchen kitchen.

farther from the truth.

And now I pass the mike, To michael bluth...

CAW.

Remember that time David and I didnt get laid?

My grandfather was a cabbie.

This is how a non-scommped drunk post shall commence. I am drinking--err, drunk--with Mounisger Smelliot FartFace.

There were a number of ladies surriounding us all day. or evening. I am making an effort to postin with good spelling.

Dudes, drunk posting is hard.

Here is smelliout:

(Free-Hou out)

lets play a love game do you love game are you in the game? something the love game. l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-lets have some fun this beat is siiiick. THE STORY OF US, IT ALWAYS STARTS THE SAME WITH A BOY AND A GIRL AND A HUT AND A GAME?

I think she means jabba the hut. He's the only Hut I can think of.

OKay. So here's the best game ever. It isn't a love game. It's still fun and its called telephone pictionary. Obviously a shitty name for it. If you can think of a better name, feel free to let me know. Here's how you play.

1. For as many people as there are in the group you are, cut that many pieces of paper per person. Thus, if you are playing with 6 people, then each person gets 6 pieces of paper for a total of 36 pieces. The pieces of paper dont need to be that big. Only about 2x4 inches per piece.
2. To start, everyone writes down a word/phrase on their piece of paper.
3. Everyone passes their pieceS of paper to the left (or right, honestly i dont care). The important part is that ALL of the pieces of paper are passed at one time, not just the one you wrote on.
4. The person who receivers the papers reads the word/phrase and then draws a picture on a different piece of paper that "describes" the word/phrase.
5. All the pieces of paper are passed to the left (or right, honestly I dont care...honestly).
6. The receiving person sees the image and then writes a word for the image but DOES NOT look at the previous card which says the word that caused the other person to draw the picture. THIS IS HOW ITS LIKE TELEPHONE AND PICTIONARY AT THE SAME TIME.
7. "the world is spinning" -FreeHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
8. skeet
9. etc continuing from step (6).
10. I apologize if the above description is unclear.

And now...stream of consciousness from free ho.

"So there was a mountain this mountain is rounded on top. most of the time it was obscured by clouds. But one time it was clear and I saw both caps. One was gorgeous and the other one was taller. The other one was purple. Tri-coconut oil. It was a gorgeous blue sky. we would see things from miles around. SPeed and endurance...muircamp. THe little people caught me on the ridge. STOP. JUMP. SHIFT. STANDING Down there. THE RED. THE WHITE. THE CLEANLines. RUMMMMM RUMMM RUMMM. To the devils kitchen we go, look for the rum rum rum through the dark. From the back of the motorcycle. Look at the fins look at the dark look at the motorcycle. Look at the markers look at the red. Make camp. Learn to ride. Learn to DRINK. BIG bend. moab (mother of all bombs). THat was the best night of my life. That was the best day of my life."

Note: open to interpretation.

Distractions

Unoriginal material, but nevertheless hilarious. Ya gotta have stuff to brighten your day.

Jon Lajoie: I had seen these two older videos of him (1, 2) but then I heard a new song by him on the radio and then I looked him up. He makes me laugh.
I Kill People
Very Super Famous
Show me your Genitals
WTF Collective
WTF Collective 2

I haven't seen anything this offensive (and hilarious) since this.

Hopefully you were amused as I was. Best line:
"Women are actually good for 4 things: cooking, cleaning, vaginas, and their sister's vagina"

Becoming a real adult aka making money with money

I do not consider myself a "grown up." I am 23 years old, I have my own apartment, and I have a job in an intellectual field, and I am financially supported by no one but myself (except for the couch my parents bought me from IKEA, but I like to think I worked hard enough in the yard to earn most of that). So why am I not a grown up?

EPIC FAIL

Remember when I said I was going to post weekly about the class I am TAing? My bad.

Here are they spark notes: