So reading through all of these comments gave me a brilliant fucking idea. We all know that coming up with brodonyms is a lot of fun, but it can also be a lot of work. Sometimes a bro needs to just chill and let someone else do the work for him. So I've come up with a little piece of software that does just that.
Presenting: Brodonyms Beta version 1.0. Just enter in a name, and the program will instantly return tons of possible brodonyms. Take for example the name "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt." Brodonyms tells us that a bro with that name could be nicknamed "Brohn Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt," or "John Brocob Jingleheimer Schmidt", or how about "John Jacob Brongleheimer Schmidt," or maybe even "John Jacob Jingleheimer Brodt." Wow, that's a lot of possible brodonyms, and you didn't even have to think at all. So use Brodonyms to come up with brodonyms for all your best bros, and you'll have a lot more free time to work on you biceps and abs.
The beta status does not mean that this was actually rigorously tested, but I'm pretty sure its not gonna crash your system. Also, it'll only work on Macs and Linux, and I'm not even sure it'll work on yours, all I know is that it works on mine. On Macs you should hopefully be able to just download the "Brodonyms b-1.0" file, choose open with, and choose the Terminal application which is in the Applications/Utilities folder. On Linux, I'm assuming you know how to use a Terminal and run Unix binaries. You might have to recompile the source file "brodonyms.cpp", but maybe the binary file will work too. If someone knows how to use Microsoft Visual Studio or something like that in windows, go ahead, have at the source code, and see if you can make a windows executable. I think maybe I'll write up a ReadMe/ Troubleshooting guide later.
I like the idea, but I think there's a certain art to coming up with suitable brodonyms. I don't think that you can just lop off the first syllable and add 'bro'. Personally, I believe that a brodonym has to stem from a syllable that has an 'o' in it, where that 'o' is replaced by 'bro'. But, take for instance the name "Jacob". A suitable brodonym for me is not "Brocob", nor is it "Jacbrob". In that case, replacing 'o' with 'bro' does not work. So, there's something more to this. (this is a stream of consciousness comment where I am trying to work out my thoughts as I type). The name "Tchaikovsky" can be turned into the brodonym "Tchaikbrovksy" or "Tchaibrovsky". That works for me. I'm not sure how that differs from "Jacbrob", but it does.
ReplyDeleteCan somebody please turn my logic into an algorithm so it can be coded?
what about stadium110.brogspot.com?
ReplyDeleteOr is stadium110.brospot.com better?
There has to be a way to quantify what the best way to brodify/brodicate/broternate a single word is.
First, the program doesn't just change the first syllable to bro, for example, someone named Eno would get the bro name Ebro. Ok that's not much more.
ReplyDeleteMaybe what you're saying is that usually a good brodonym isn't too far from the original name. That's something that could be turned into an algorithm.
I guess you're right Ted. That IS what I'm saying. But we need to find a way to codify the ability to determine whether or not a brodonym sounds right.
ReplyDeleteIt's sort of similar to finding a way to capture the beauty of the Mona Lisa in a Paint-By-Numbers™.
Elliot, to your example, I don't think you can brodify the URL of our website. Neither sounds right.
ReplyDeleteIt's not software...its a computer brogram.
ReplyDeleteoh snap!
ReplyDeleteYou guys are great. Limited blog access makes this even funnier.
ReplyDelete