Goldfish Swallowing, Neon Indian, Washed Out, DFA, and all things funemployed!

I was originally going to write a post a week or two back about all these sweet bands I found through Wikipedia.  I did this by originally looking up Hot Chip and then clicking through on the "related acts" link to see a bunch of others.  I soon realized that all of them shared a common label, DFA (Death From Above), and consequently downloaded everything from that label.  Then I realized all these bands were supposedly popular freshman year and I was, once again, late to jump on the bandwagon.  But nonetheless, if you were too, I would highly, HIGHLY recommend Out Hud, The Rapture, The Juan MacLean, and Black Leotard Front if you like Hot Chip.  I would also recommend The Knife.  

After my original music idea, I was going to write about the phenomenon of goldfish swallowing (apparently a common frat-party activity) originally popularized in the 1930s by Harvard freshman Lothrop Withington.  I think this is absolutely hilarious/repulsive and I'm confused as to why it was so popular.

Once it became apparent that my thoughts about goldfish swallowing were limited, and thus so too was my ability to write anything about it, I sat here, funemployed and without pants, and waited.  Then, I discovered some new music.  This stuff is actually new.  I hope nobody has heard it yet.  

I was just recently encouraged to listen to Washed Out.  My source told me, "If you like Passion Pit, you may like this."  He then sent me the EP (which has yet to be released?!).  I must say, this stuff is great.  It's sort of MGMT, sort of Passion Pit, all chill.  iTunes calls it "Synth-Pop".  Other people call it "Chill Wave".  I'm not enough of an indie/hipster dude to really know what I'm talking about, but I know enough to like this music and enjoy it for what it is.  Find the "Life of Leisure" EP on a rapidshare feed at your convenience.  To give you an indication of its liveliness, I would not end a pre-game with this music.  I would begin a night with it, and maybe end a night with it, but definitely nothing in the middle.

My enjoyment of Washed Out led me to another artist.  Neon Indian actually came before Washed Out (according to Hipster Runoff), but who really cares?  It's a similar style (Chill Wave) and very enjoyable to listen to.  Both projects aren't quite as lively as Passion Pit or MGMT, but they exude similar musical styles and therefore are very enjoyable.  I loved MGMT but got sick of them fairly quickly.  I think the variety that these bands provide will be quite useful in avoiding such an illness again.  On the pre-game scale, I think Neon Indian would prove to be a good pre-game band throughout most of an entire pre-game session.  Again, snag the EP (Psychic Chasms) on a rapidshare feed.

Enjoy the music.  See you all in a week.

When does everyone arrive?

...

The Wrong Hole

Hey All,

Great video here. Whoever made this video is hilarious. Especially what happens at 2:36.

See everyone at the meet!

Exercise 3

Hey everyone,

So here is an exercise I had to do for one of my production classes. I know making movies for homework is a sweet concept.
So with that said, the goal of this assignment was to show a character making a decision. We were not allowed to use sound which made us focus solely on telling a visual story. Let me know what you all think. (This is just a rough cut, but the final product will look very similar.)

A Carleton College Week One of Fall Term 2009 Update from Third Year Student Mark "Scourge of the Midwest" Olson

A man without a mustache is like a cup of tea without sugar.
-English Proverb

I like that quote and it reminded me of when Ted and I (and sorta Nonberg, although he cheated) did mustache club.



Okay, So here is my Carleton update. I forget that several of those who read this blog are not anywhere near Carleton.

Swimming Stuff:
So on Wednesday, we had our first team meeting. First things first, the email said there would be snacks. Upon arrival, I soon found out... that there were actually no snacks to be found. I made my unhappiness known to a few select individuals. There were a lot of us there. I think the girls have somewhere between 5-9 freshman, and the guys have about 12ish. I know some are on the fence though. The coaches and captains introduces themselves and then we broke off into genders, where we did introductions and a lil Q & A for the freshman. Then that was pretty much it. We went to a team dinner at Burton, which has experienced some changes (I'll explain later).

The freshman seem cool. Rumors are that some have a bit of a cockiness to them (I don't know what about, exactly - someone just said that). I think they just might be freshman, and I'll give em a chance. Some are quite cool though. Some of the guys played knock out today, which was tight. A few of the fresh ones showed up and a couple of them were pretty damn good (Momoru, for example). I think the Cocktail Party is going to be a gee golly good time.

Okay, Burton - Bad things first: The long tables are gone. Instead they have been replaces by small tables that are perpendicular to the windows/wall. They seat about 6 - 8. This new format does fit more people in the space. However, it is terrible for team unity. I've already started a "Comment Card Campaign." Louise, Brenner and Djem are quite enthusiastic about writing serious and silly cards about the issue. Boo short tables.

Another change is the elimination of Mundo Latino... Instead there is a World station that will supposably serve mundo latino-like dishes occasionally, but has only served bad curry for the past week. (Also this new World station is where heartland prairie used to be and the heartlannd is now where mundo latino used to be...) Boo no Mundo Latino.

They have also changed the entry way to the Sevy side of Burton. Now the ONLY enterance is through the double doors by the bathroom. That big block door where we used to enter is now always closed. Boo it being harder to sneak in.

Also (this is temporary but it still sucks), the new freshman dining hall workers are still scared to give more than the serving size their boss says they can. MEANING that I had to go up and get THREE plates full of Sweet Potatoe Fries, because the little chubby white girl freshman was to afraid of the big black chef. Hopefully this will subside soon. Boo incompetent dining hall workers and fear mongering supervisors.

Positive changes to Burton (there are only a few):
The mysterious room behind the double doors which where right by our long table and the coat rack is now a dining area. There are a few bigger tables and the team is considering taking over that room each dinner. (Providing more space there gives them less of a reason to not change back to the long tables, right?)

There is now a tray return over by the tea room. Although I do not use the tea room (like at all), this is good for the Carleton community.

Also, on an unrelated note, last weekend Caitlin and Black Ice stopped by when Megan's townhouse (Euchster) threw a lil rager! Good times were had by all.

Okay, that was the Burton Dining Hall Status Report Tangent and Carleton Status Report. Over and Out.

Wolf Blitzer is dumb

I was watching celebrity jeopardy today and the strangest thing happened. In hindsight, I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. The three contestants were Wolf Blitzer, Andy Richter, and some lady actress I didn't recognize. Basically, at the end of the 2nd round, Wolf had -$4,600 (the negative sign is not a typo) and Andy Richter had $39,000. The segment I'm talking about can be found here.

I'm not going to lie, I've always thought that the women in the news mostly got their jobs because they were attractive. I mean, let's be honest, most of them are (see exhibit 1, 2, 3). And they're just reading a teleprompter anyway, right? Well, because I'm a sexist pig, I assumed that the men got the job based on merit. I guess male anchors are just as dumb. Now it could be that he just isn't as good at jeopardy. But to get -4600! C'mon, Wolf! You'd think he'd have learned something with that hologram they have at CNN.

This makes me so happy though. Of course there are wonderfully smart people out there who are doing their best in academia and the government, for example, but I'm talking about the wonderfully smart people who entertain us. And for some other reason, I'm not talking about in writing books. I'm talking about the smart comedians. Here are some:

Andy Richter (apparently)
Elizabeth Banks - UPenn magna cum laude
Steve Colbert - Northwestern
Conan O'Brien - magna cum laude from Harvard
Natalie Portman - Harvard, she's mostly funny because of this.

Okay, I suppose the real point of this post was to show how smart elizabeth banks is. Isn't she a babe? I love her...I think I might have a chance too.

a comparison between umd and carleton

I've been at the university of maryland in college park for about 3 weeks now. There are so many differences between UMD and Carleton, so I am only going to point out a handful.

1) Famous people. Today, President Obama came to campus to talk about health care. Ya'll might be upset, but I didn't go. Obama was supposed to talk at 11am, they opened the doors at 9am, and they allowed people to line up at 5am. I really did not want to wait for 4-6 hours to hear him talk. I know, I'm a piece of shit. It's kind of like how I didn't go to see Scarlett Johannson when she visited. I suppose Al Franken and Kip Thorne also visited Carleton...but those are the 3 most famous people that visited in the four years I was there...at least that I know of. Anyway, Obama spoke here within 3 weeks...beat that!

2) Exploring Campus. Maryland is huge. One things I've realized about Maryland is that I will probably never go into most of the buildings. So far I've been in the materials science building, the physics building, the mechanical/aerospace engineering building, the student center (like sayles), and the rec center...and I suppose the football stadium counts too. And I've only been in the mech/aerospace engineering building to talk to a prof. who's office is there. Its as if I went to Carleton and only went in Olin, the CMC, Sayles, and the Rec. It takes so long to walk around everywhere...fortunately there are plenty of state-school grade girls everywhere.

3) the Segregation. I'm not talking racially here, I'm talking intellectually. There are literally "smart" and "dumb" dorms. It's basically the university's attempt at building a community. All the first years who come in with good grades and high test scores live in a group of buildings called the "Cambridge Community." The 4 dorm buildings (which are huge), surround a little courtyard that has banners that say things like "Economy, Environment, and Technology." Anyway, this dorm building is on the other side of campus as the other dorms, which are apparently like interest houses in that an entire dorm could be devoted to students who put on their application that they were interested in spanish. Okay, I'm starting to ramble now, so this section is done.

4) Athletics. I went to my first D1 football game last weekend when Liz visited. It was Maryland vs James Madison. There were over 46,000 people in the stadium and 2 jumbotrons. Of course there were all the overpriced foods like boardwalk fries and funnel cake too. I was sitting in the student section, and apparently its customary for the students to stand the entire game. Also, anytime a JMU student walked by, everyone would start chanting "Asshole, Asshole, Asshole" and point in their direction. I was so happy to be wearing a Maryland shirt. It was tight though. I was amazed when I first walked in. Did I mention that the stadium has night lights? Carleton should get some of those. The one thing I do love the most about Carleton athletics is that I am watching people I know play. At Maryland, I really couldn't care less. And tailgating! Wow. So many people chilling in the parking lots drinking. And littering like crazy. When Liz and I were walking back to the car, there was trash everywhere. It's like the cops pretend not to see or something.

5) Cops. Speaking of cops. I see at least 3 cop cars everyday. They are everywhere! Of course I never speed, so I'm not too worried.

6) Independence. Carleton does not prepare you for the real world. Carleton holds your hand throughout all 4 years. If you want to get things done at Maryland, you have to do it yourself. No one is going to come to you and let you know what you have or haven't turned in...unless its for money.

7) Freebies. There are so many things at Carleton that I took for granted. At Maryland, it costs $35 to get a locker at the rec center for one semester, $25 to get towel service for a semester, and $18-$30 each time you want to use the climbing wall or challenge course. I hope this doesn't make me sound cheap. On a side note, inside the rec center here is a place that sells the same smoothies we used to have in the snack bar. I was so happy about that.

8) Office Hours/Faculty. This is a huge difference from Carleton. A lot of faculty I have met with (especially the older ones) have offices both at Maryland and somewhere else, most commonly at NIST. Basically, they are only on campus on the days they have class. It's such a bummer when you're stuck on a problem. Some of the best faculty members don't even teach classes sometimes because they have so much grant money to do research that teaching would get in the way.

Well, those are the only ones I can think of off the top of my head. I'll have to write a real blog post one of these days...

Since we all know it's never too early to plan a party...

...(except if it's Tuesday and your party is on Friday).. 

WE ALSO KNOW IT'S NEVER TOO EARLY TO PLAN A PRE-GAME!! YEEHAW.

Given that Ted mentioned pre-gaming in his post, and that I am currently "funemployed" (thanks Dave), Nonberg and I have decided that I am going to compile a pre-game playlist for Friday night of alumni weekend since, well, there's nothing else to do!

So, send suggestions via comment and I will SadSteve them and make everyone happy.  And I will also entertain myself while doing so. 

There's also plenty of new music I've been listening to in my new, funemployed state of being.  So, maybe I'll post about it sometime soon.

Addendum to "I Know What I Did Last Summer": What's Wrong With Bars That Serve Too Much Beer

I never, ever thought I'd have a problem with bars that serve beer.  In fact, I don't have a problem with bars that serve beer.  The bars that serve TOO MUCH beer are the ones with which I have a problem (never hang your prepositions!).  And really, I never thought I'd have a problem with too much beer, either.  Alas, things change.

I hope you all know what I'm talking about.  We've all been to the-best-beer-bar-in-the-world, with the-biggest-selection-of-beer-on-the-planet.  But, we've all been to different places.  How does this work!?  Places like Capital Ale House in Richmond, VA, The Flying Saucer (a chain!), and the Brickskeller in Washington D.C. all come to my mind.  I've been to all of these, but others exist as well.  Ebenezer's in Lovell-fucking-Maine is supposedly the best beer bar in the world (according to our favorite site, Beer Advocate).  But, really, bars like this exist everywhere.  In fact, as I mentioned in the previous post, I went to one in Dallas and it was so fucking pedestrian that I don't even remember the name.  My main problem is simple: they all claim to be unique, and yet, they're all the same.

Every single one of these beer bars claims to have the best selection, and be the only place in the world where you can have such an experience.  But, really, they all have exactly the same selection, and they all make the world of beer seem rather small.  They also all claim to serve ridiculous Belgian beer and be the only place that does that, but really, they all serve ridiculous Belgian beer and are NOT the only places that do that.  I could go on and on.  They've all begun to blend into one stupid beer-serving entity in my mind at this point.  I used to love these places.  I'd eat them up.  But now, when offered the chance to go to one, I'm emotionless because they don't move me.  They shouldn't move you, either.

My second problem with these places is that they're all so fucking expensive.  Ordering a bottle of High Life will cost you at least 4.50.  That seems ridiculous, because I can buy a six pack of High Life for about 5 bucks.  That's more than the rule-of-thumb traditional 400% markup on booze that bars and restaurants follow.  The 400% markup is absurd enough, so paying anything more is stupid.  Don't even get me started on how much is costs to order anything even remotely crafty.  Plus, half the shit is in bottles anyway.  Who goes to a bar to drink beer in BOTTLES?  I can drink beer in bottles at home!  When I do that, I'm not limited by some stupid menu, but rather only by what I can or cannot buy.  

My third problem with these places is that they are boring.  Their ambience, their atmosphere, their overall drinking environment all lack any interesting qualities.  Nobody goes to these places to get schwasted (because everything is so fucking expensive), so you never see any interesting people.  Rather, you simply see people doing what they could be doing at home: sipping on beer.  Yet, they'd prefer to come to a place to be bored with other people and pay too much to sip on beer together.  When I was in D.C. at the Brickskeller I began to play darts with Elliot's friend on a dart board that had barely been used.  If you've been to the Brickskeller you know this place has been around a while.  It's a bar, people!  Play darts! Don't sit there being bored.  Also, we played some music from their juke box and I think the fact that the atmosphere went from soft talking about the Belgian brew to actual music was difficult for some to handle.  It's a bar, people! Play music!  Don't sit there with your hushed voices.

My fourth problem with these places is that the people who frequent them think they know way too much about beer.  I know amongst all of you myself and perhaps Ted are viewed as beer snobs.  But really, I don't pour different types of beer into different types of glasses to accentuate the bouquet that may or may not exist.  I don't sit there with my collared-shirted friend discussing the many aspects of the creamy head that sits atop my glass.  I say I like the taste and I drink it.  I drink more than one.  I drink it rapidly.

My fifth problem with these places is that they carry an unwarranted air of sophistication about them.  Case in point: Deep Ellum, Boston, MA.  This place is not even a very good "beer bar", but they had perhaps the most snobbish attitude of any of which I have yet visited.  After each person was served beer in a different type of glass to best present the beer that was ordered, we enjoyed what seemed like liquid gold, as we had paid just about that much for the privilege of drinking such nectar.  Soon after, I decided that I was sick of beer (because these places kinda suck), and I wanted a Red Bull Vodka.  Well, apparently this place was too-fucking-good for Red Bull.  I went to the bartender and asked, "If I were to order a drink that necessitated the use of Red Bull, would you be able to serve it to me?"  Not only did she just say "No" (which would have been at least acceptable, albeit quite sad), she laughed in my face and said "Absolutely not!"  Fuck that.

I Know What I Did Last Summer

Today is September 12th.  This date officially marks the end of my summer - it's time to get down to business.  I can't really remember when the last time I posted was.  I just know it was a while ago.  Thus, I give you an update on this most significant of days, explaining what I have done for the past six weeks, and more importantly, what I plan to do for the upcoming months.

Sometime around July 20 I boarded a bus in Portland, ME and drove to Boston, MA where I boarded a plane to fly to Baltimore, MD where I got off a plane and boarded another one where I flew to Dallas, TX where my aunt picked me up in the airport and I boarded a car and was driven to her house.  I spent a few days in Dallas, going to cool places like the Apple Store, the Nasher Museum, Primo's,  and a place that served a lot of obscure beers (I forgot the name, but if I remember this topic I will explain why this does not matter).  

Sometime around July 23 our fellow stadium-mate John Vigeland drove the Lexus From Texas™ across the vast expanse of Texas megalopolis from Fort Worth to Dallas, and retrieved me from my aunt's house.  We drove to a hare krisha temple where we were served vegetarian Indian cuisine and only requested to donate money.  The food was delicious and we were quite full at the end of lunch.  We spent the next few days in Fort Worth meeting John's friends, going to get ice cream at Braum's, and preparing for the Great American Adventure™.

On July 26, we awoke ourselves from our slumber at the early hour of 6am.  We packed the car, ate some food, and set out on our adventure by 7:30am, ready to conquer the Eastern Seaboard.  Our destination was Nashville, TN, as we had heard about an excellent blue grass jam session set to occur at 9pm that evening at the Station Inn (complete with blind banjo player!).  As we drove east from Fort Worth, we promptly got lost.  

We soon found our way back on track, set the cruise control to 75mph, and pointed the car towards Nashville.  We arrived approximately 12 hours later, enjoyed the blue grass jam sesh, local beer, and pizza, and then walked along Broadway for a bit.  Nashville is a sweet city.

Now, so as to not bore you all with a day by day description of our road trip and all that occurred, I will simply list out the next few stops because, frankly, typing out an extended description of each simply does not do the trip justice.  Check out the facebook pics if you want more.

1. Nashville, TN (already explained)

2. Marshall, NC (rafting the Pigeon, karaoke in Asheville, etc.)

3. Charlotte, NC (Halo 2 all day and laundry)

4. Richmond, VA (request further explanation)

5. Shenandoah National Park, VA (much needed respite from alcohol and civilization)

6. Washington D.C. (Elliot's pool)

7. New York City, NY (fuck the police... and the prices... and the tolls...)

8. Cherry Valley, NY (chilled in a debris hut)

9. Boston, MA (pretended to buy engagement rings, saw really cool ceramics)

10. Naples, ME (helped my parents move, rope swings, etc)

We stayed in Naples for like ten days and then went to Algonquin Park in Ontario, CA.  This drive took a long time, but the destination made the drive well worth it.  We stayed at my family's cabin for ten days and then we were off to Northfield!  We left quite early in the morning, and toyed with the idea of driving straight to Northfield (18 hours).  We would have accomplished this except for two things.  One, we got slightly lost and probably went about an hour out of our way, and two, we were detained at the U.S. border for about 45 minutes, suspected of carrying marijuana from Canada to the U.S.  I kid you not.  Let me explain:

Looking a bit scruffy, unkempt, and generally "progressive", John and I drove through Sault Ste. Marie, ON toward the American border.  We made our way onto the International Bridge, connecting Canada and the U.S. and were politely reminded by a road sign to "Smile!" because we were on camera.  We met the Border Patrol agent who politely asked for our passports.  We gave them to him, he took them into his little shack, and then told us to wait.  Another officer came out of a different building carrying a still-unidentified piece of metal equipment and strictly directed me to drive alongside him as he walked.  We were to pull into the garage bay that was open to our right.  As we pulled in, it became apparent to us that there were probably about nine other officers along with the previous two, all just chilling in this garage bay.  We were instructed to exit the car, walk to a table, and empty our pockets onto said table.

Having done so, the agent then rifled through our wallets, smelled my hat (wtf?), and the following exchange occurred:

Officer: Where are you coming from today?

Me: Algonquin Park in Ontario

Officer: Really.  Did you go to Hemp Fest?

Me: No, sir.

Officer: Were you anywhere near HempFest?

Me: No, sir.

Officer: How do you know each other?

Me: We went to school together.

Officer: What was your major?

Me: International Relations (should have said "horticulture")

John (interjects): I was studio art!

Officer: Who is the car registered to?

John: My father.

Officer: Well let's get this all straight.  This car is going to be searched completely.  If we find anything at all, you two will be headed to prison and the car will be seized.  I bet your father wouldn't be too happy about that.  So, let's make this easy.  If there's anything at all that we should know about or that you shouldn't have, tell us now.  Or else, this could get real messy.

Me:  I can't think of anything (nervous breathing, heart pumping out of body)

They search the car, and two funny instances occurred.  One, the dog freaked out at one point, clearly smelling something.  All the officers got a little excited, and it turned out that they found a box of Kashi Go Lean that we had sitting in the trunk.  Two, an officer was going through our stuff in the back seat and came across a plastic baggy full of tea leaves.  He held it up, examined it, and proclaimed, "Guys! I've found the mother lode!"

After they found nothing (phew!), we were free to go.  This, combined with taking a wrong turn later in the drive, forced us to stay at an AmericInn in Wausau, WI and drive the remaining four hours of the drive the next morning.  We arrived in Northfield on August 31, having completed 4789 miles of driving between July 26 and August 31.  Our road trip was effectively finished.

In Northfield, I helped John move in, chilled with Viveka a bunch, and just generally relaxed.  I avoided real life for twelve days, and awkwardly pretended I was in college again.  I ate at Tiny's, went to the Cow, went to the Reub, went to Ho Bro's, went to the Hideaway, ate Basil's gyro pizza (twice!), napped in Memorial while watching baseball, and tried to avoid walking around campus and being that guy.  I guess napping in Memorial sorta messed up that plan though.  Oh, I also got the new phone numbers for the yellow security phones for Memorial and Cassat.  Word.

But, all good things must come to an end and so too did my time in Northfield and my summer.  No longer can I avoid supporting myself and getting a job.  Right now, it looks as if I'll be moving to Minneapolis and working for a start-up I got involved with this summer.  Things will become a lot more clear in the coming week, and I will keep you all updated as to what is occurring.  In an ideal world, I will have solid plans at the end of this week and hopefully be moved out there by the end of the month.  Be optimistic.  

Coincidentally, the end of the month is homecoming.  I am doing my very best to make sure that I am back for that, as I would like to avoid being tarred and feathered, being banned from the blog, or having a penis drawn on my face with Sharpie.  I really want to be able to jump on Mark and Alfredo and BK while they sleep so soundly.